Archive for Unhappiness

Why we use unhappiness

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico introduces how we use unhappiness to stay in touch with our wanting. Staying in touch with our wanting is more important to us than getting what we want, because it is our only hope of eventually getting what we want. He discusses how, when we do not get what […]

Defining Unhappiness

There are four basic definitions of unhappiness: (1) unhappiness is believing you are not free. (2) believing you are against yourself. (3) believing it would be wrong to have the feelings you like. (4) the belief in the wrongness of being: that your actions or feelings or the world could be wrong.

Being Self-Defeating

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico discusses beliefs that we can be self-defeating. The only cause of unhappiness is believing that something can cause unhappiness. This “something” always ends up being ourselves. Unhappiness means that I believe that I do, or want, or think, or feel a way that is bad for me. All unhappiness […]

More on how Unhappiness happens

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico offers more perspective on how unhappiness happens. He discusses how finding out that you don’t have to be unhappy about one thing generalizes—for example, when you are not unhappy about how someone at work treats you, you will often find that you are not unhappy about how anyone at […]

There’s Something Wrong with You, Part I

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico discusses the core reason for unhappiness behind all apparent reasons. Unhappiness seems to happen for a variety of reasons, but it does not. The only reason for unhappiness is believing that you are the reason you are not getting what you want. Unhappiness is: There’s something wrong with me, […]

There’s Something Wrong with You, Part II

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico talks more about the illusion that unhappiness is in any way productive. He starts out with the simple truth: Everyone tends toward being happier. He explores the non-necessity of reasons. Reasons are not necessary for happiness. In perfect happiness, wanting and doing are perfectly congruent; reasons don’t necessarily come […]

Myths of Unhappiness

In this writing, Bruce Di Marsico outlines myths of unhappiness….

The Cause of Unhappiness/Only Personal Happiness Exists

The cause of unhappiness is a belief. What happens, no matter how undesirable or destructive to our life, health, desires or loves, does not cause unhappiness. The belief that we have to be unhappy is the only cause….

If You Seem Unhappy, You Can Know You are Not

So is it true that people don’t have to be unhappy, but just believe in it? Since that’s true, what follows from that in your life?

Fearing unhappiness, is unhappiness

In this talk, Bruce Di Marsico touches on a number of subjects. First, if you fear unhappiness, you will be unhappy. This is being unhappy about being unhappy. Wanting to be happier is not the same as fearing unhappiness, just as wanting to have more money is not the same as fearing having none. Second, […]

All you need to know about your life (handout)

The seven understandings of unhappiness.

Unhappiness and Depression

The Seven Understandings of All Unhappiness

The Experience of Unhappiness (commentary)

Bruce Di Marsico: “Unhappiness is what it feels like to try to believe a way that you don’t”.

Unhappiness doesn’t exist (commentary)

There was a time when many thought they suffered from demon-possession. They did not. Demon-possession does not exist. They suffered from the belief that demon-possession existed, and was happening to them right now. No one suffers from unhappiness. What is suffered is the experience of believing that unhappiness exists, and is happening right now. Unhappiness […]

Believing you should be different

Unhappiness is believing you should not have been able to be who you are.

All “Shoulds” are beliefs

All “shoulds” are beliefs of what to do, feel, say, think, believe, know, want, have, be, etc. in order to avoid unhappiness. e.g. “I should want this if I am taking care of myself”.